Category Archives: Eating

Why Do I Eat So Fast? Debunking the Eating Gloves Myth

I have a reputation for eating fast. My friend Dustin concocted a story that when I was child I had to wear gloves when I ate so I would not accidentally bite one of my fingers. Dustin brings this up at the most embarrassing times. Unfortunately for me this ridiculous cock and bull story seems plausible. Dustin has convinced dozens of people that it might be true, even my younger sister. (WTF Ann?! Have a little faith in me.)

The eating glove myth started back in college. It had something to do with pizza. Continue reading Why Do I Eat So Fast? Debunking the Eating Gloves Myth


The Thankful Habit

Thanksgiving is by far my favorite holiday. It’s always been an event for my extended family. Most of my mom’s siblings live in the same town, so it was natural to celebrate in the same place. At its zenith there were 25+ people attending, from grandparents to aunts/uncles to cousins to nieces/nephews.

In spite of (or maybe because of) the large crowd, Thanksgiving was always a casual and come-as-you-are affair. My mom is the oldest sibling and as such had the right of first refusal to host dinner, but occasionally her next in line sibling, Katie, hosted. In either case, the format was the same. Version 2Each family was responsible for some dish, which was mostly done but needed some final touches right before dinner was served. Families trickled in starting in late afternoon and the cookers did their thing in the kitchen. I was not a cooker. I was an eater.

My only real Thanksgiving responsibility was to gorge myself so that there weren’t too many leftovers. It was great! I came through in the clutch 100% of the time. There was nothing else I had to do or worry about. That is, until Katie threw a curveball in 1996. Continue reading The Thankful Habit


Guess Who’s Back!

Cue up the theme song from the Greatest American Hero (and George Constanza’s answering machine):

george-believe-it-or-notBelieve it not Don isn’t at home (with his parents)

Please leave a message at the beep

I’m not around (anymore) or I’d pick the phone

Where could I be?!?

HellOOOOO Chicago! I am back!

6+ months ago I shamelessly announced I was unemployed and living with my parents. It was bar none, the most attention grabbing blog post I’ve written to date. I’ll admit it was a little self-indulgent. Who am I kidding? It was a lot self-indulgent. Continue reading Guess Who’s Back!


Ignorance is Bliss

Whenever I’m offered a piece chocolate cake I politely turn it down, which leads to a casual inquisition why. There is always somebody around who finds in unfathomable that I would refuse a piece of delicious chocolate cake. What could be my excuse?! chocolate-cakeDon runs marathons constantly, so he can’t be on a diet or anything like that, right?

The Nosey Nancy is correct that I’m not on a diet. I just don’t like chocolate cake. The reason is I was allergic to chocolate as a child. The allergy went away as I grew older, so it’s not like I’ll break into hives if I eat a Hershey’s Kiss. Continue reading Ignorance is Bliss


Why You Should Sell Your Car to Lose Weight

Can you imagine getting by without a car?

Most people cannot, but I definitely can because I haven’t owned a car for 7 years. People are always surprised when I tell them that, but also are usually awed by it. Owning a car represents freedom and has been a huge part of the American dream for generations. Why would I give up that freedom? It turns out freedom is really convenience. As with almost anything, convenience has its costs. These costs can be hard to find, particularly for car ownership.

bad_mechanic_with_partI first thought to sell my car in 2008 when I receiving a shockingly high maintenance bill. At the time I was living in Chicago and barely used my car. I didn’t need it to go to work, or meet out friends, or even to visit my parents on holidays. I could use the train for any of those. I drove my car to get groceries and run random errands about once a week. That’s it. So why was it costing $500 a year to repair a car I hardly used?! Continue reading Why You Should Sell Your Car to Lose Weight